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Sara Gilson’s family and friends are grappling with the loss after the influencer and mother was found dead along with her estranged husband in what authorities are treating as an apparent murder-suicide. The shocking discovery in Tulsa has left loved ones remembering her humor, devotion to her children and the public struggles she shared in recent weeks.
Scene in Tulsa and the official response
Police discovered two bodies inside a home in Tulsa, Oklahoma, on July 23. Authorities say both victims have been identified as Sara Gilson and her estranged husband, Shawn Duffey. Gilson was 43.
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Investigators interviewed a family member at the scene who described the deaths as a murder-suicide. An active investigation remains open as detectives piece together timelines and evidence.
- Date found: July 23
- Location: Tulsa, Oklahoma
- Status: Police investigating; report of murder-suicide from a relative at the scene
How friends are remembering Sara Gilson
Those closest to Gilson have emphasized her warmth and sense of humor in recent interviews. Her longtime friend, Kelsi Lard, said she spent time with Gilson the same day the tragedy occurred and remembered her as playful and fun-loving.
Lard stressed that Gilson would want to be known first as a devoted parent. She described Gilson as having told friends that being a mother was her proudest achievement. Her children were central to her identity, friends say.
Public accusations and the weeks before her death
In the weeks leading up to the deaths, Gilson went public with serious accusations against Duffey, including claims of pedophilia. Duffey did not respond to those allegations before his death.
Gilson and Duffey had separated earlier in the summer. In social posts, Gilson spoke about the pain of the split and the priority she placed on her children’s safety and mental health.
Her final public message
On social media, Gilson thanked supporters for messages and practical help while describing herself as grieving and focused on protecting her children. She wrote about relying on faith during an overwhelming time.
Ex-husband Lyle Landers on the relationship and coparenting
Gilson’s ex-husband, Lyle Landers, with whom she shared two children, described the former couple’s coparenting as strong. Landers said they had divorced years earlier but had managed to provide stability for their kids.
Landers told reporters he had urged Gilson to leave the relationship with Duffey for years. He claimed she felt trapped and suggested that her attempts to shield children from harm played a role in the events that followed.
Key facts to know
- Victims: Sara Gilson (43) and Shawn Duffey
- Reported cause: Authorities were told the incident appears to be a murder-suicide
- Ongoing work: Police continue to investigate and gather evidence
- Public allegations: Prior claims by Gilson about Duffey circulated online
Help and resources for people in crisis or facing abuse
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call local emergency services right away.
- Suicide prevention: Call or text 988 or visit 988lifeline.org
- Domestic violence: National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233
- Child abuse: Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453 (call or text)
